Sunday, July 31, 2005
It's surprising how much a drinker I am. After downing 1.5litres(3x500ml) of beer, it works barely vanquishing much of the hatred and pain in me. Lol. All these were supposed to buy myself some sleep after these beer but I guess, I've failed. To think I'm in the morning shift tomorrow? Am I f*cked? Been pulling a face which resembles my family been massacred for the whole of today... even one of my promotors suggests that I shouldn't turn up for work if I were to carry the same face and having the same mood of not able to work tomorrow. Maybe I should? Maybe... maybe... there's just, so many maybes in life, isn't it? Lol

Stopped a internal struggle between my promotors today. Fancy quarrelling and nearly fighting over a manuquin! Much do I think I assessed the situation correctly and acting promptly and impartially, man, I was wrong. I sided with Thomas Smith whom was never on good terms with the rest for once and hell, I provoked the rest. F*ck it I would say. I ought to be impartial yah? It's not her in the wrong anyway. And f*ck it more that the Montagut aunty came up to say and say that life isn't always fair and I shouldn't act like that anyway. F*ck it. Is that a threat to me or what? I accept no threats and bribery alike. Suck up to me you may, but when the situation reckons, I only side with the righteous. God and the management empowered me to judge and to make decisions, I ought to place it into good use yeah?

All the lights is making me blind. Time to reside back into the darkness where I used to belong yeah?

She went out with him today. The hypocrite who has turned friend to foe alike. He's deep I would say. Telling and acting differently when the situation reckons. May his mutha get rabids for giving birth a rodent like him. I want to teach him a lesson. I want to. I crave to. But I can't. As I probably will just find multiple stab marks on him if I were to act alone. I ought to think of other ways. I Ought to make him pay for the oath and lies he said to me ;) God, you ought to bless him, and me nevertheless yeah?

The beers are not working.
Though it's pretty neat time to sleep.

God bless the soul whom reading these. May your life be futile and don't even think bout leading the life that I'm leading now yeah?

Alive without Breath,
As Cold as Death.